GENETICS & ENVIRONMENT
Mom & Dad were highly uneducated & quite unaccomplished. Both were very handsome & in great physical shape; no fat, athletic-looking, strong & physically resilient. Lucky I’d guess since they were both totally un-athletic. Known seemingly as a, “handsome couple that looked good together”… As 1st Siegalbaum, my Mom, Barbara may’ve been father Julie’s favored child, she loved to go fishing with my Namesake, Grandpa Julie. I never met Julie since I was named after his death as with Jewish traditions. His wife, my Grandma Jean always said I was his “spitting image”. I still believe this even though Julie’s times & upbringings were different than mine. Yeah, I think it’s a good chance I’m Julie Siegalbam’s reincarnation… I always longed to know him but if I “am” him, well, I do know him. If not I’d love to get advice from Julie as he sure sounded like my kind of guy! No. I’m no spiritual or religious fanatic but I do believe in GOD & pray a good amount in my own way. I pray usually to be better, stronger, smarter & help those around me whom I love which is everyone; even those who I have hatred for. I absolutely love everyone, no kidding! I don’t believe in religion at all; I believe that institutionalizing spiritual beliefs was the beginning of human separations, conflicts & wars. Because by definition there is not one religion, so that alone, to me means it’s a false act to persuade anyone to abide by one single set of beliefs for any reason except selfish control over them & their assets. I have my own set of beliefs that have no dependence upon what I read in a book or faith in unproven facts. My beliefs are based on I what I see in my own life & experience in my own life; not on the beliefs of anyone else. I do believe Jesus existed; seems as Moses was there too along with many great ones by biblical acts that were documented. I think Jesus loves everyone & me no matter what, as GOD does. As for reading into these biblical powerhouses much further I believe it’s up to the individual to extrapolate as to what means what & why… I believe there must be many more with similar Jesus-Like powers today & as time goes on. Many more great people with followers appeared after Jesus & maybe some before. Maybe Jesus had more strength; that I don’t know for sure but I do know that there were much fewer people on Earth at Jesus’ time & much less communication so he might just stand out as #1 as opposed to, say, Catherine The Great, Gandhi, or Martin Luther King & others who seemed more than human & have followers to this day. Judging from what (little) I know it appears that whole idea of loving all humans, animals & everything around us makes logical sense . The idea that we’ll be punished some way beyond the golden rule; sorry I see no proof of that & that faith thing as per someone else’s rendition of what was written a long time ago? Naaaah nothing in my life lead me anywhere near blind faith of anything let alone books rewritten, edited & reinterpreted for about 2,000 years… I really trust that humans have fine capacity to know what’s good & bad for them, other people, animals, plants, Earth & the Universe. Any institutions built on a human lack of faith in him or herself may be necessary for many folks; not me. Now as for those who need that support, I don’t believe that Abraham, Jesus, Buddha (depends what you believe, right?), etc would want them to think poorly of us or that we’ll get punished or that we’re missing anything. Now those that need to look down to us people who may be Atheist or Agnostic? That’s the same as anyone that needs to look down on anyone: Insecurity. I go into this because I see that many freedoms along with many lives are limited because of religious beliefs. Much politics & marketing bullshit is based on religious beliefs; that a higher power guides us & if we don’t comply with certain rules of right & wrong, according to someone else’s interpretations, we’ll be punished into eternity.
Grandpa
Julie was a big kibitzer; a joker in Yiddish. He enjoyed the fight game,
serious fishing & boating as I understand. He was a tough little guy I was
told. Photos of him remind me of Popie the Sailor cartoon; a small, tough guy
that’ll knock big Bluto on his butt. Similar is my love for boating; I do fish
but not as Julie did. Maybe modern times got me into water-sports &
wakeboarding more so. But my boat is a pure fishing boat mainly since fishing
boats are built tougher. I always loved boxing but missed out on this as a
youth. At 29 I became an amateur boxer. Under 6 feet tall & 175-185 LBS it was
easier to fight bigger, slower boys than kids my size or smaller. These were
boys as no boxer in training was older than early 20’s; most were about 15-19
years. Running the business under 40 hours per week I held my own with no fear but
couldn’t beat all kids boxing their way out of poverty. Still the experience of
a true, sweaty, dirty, honest boxing gym was like a sanctuary to Jules the
businessman from the streets, ya know? It was like meditation.
Joking
I too
love kidding with everyone, sometimes going too far with some less jovial
types. Those with low tolerance & no sense of humor may not like me
especially. Laughing at other people’s
expense may be my way of trying to make stressed, bland, boring or dumb folks
laugh at themselves but this talent of mine usually just annoys these types
even more. Wrong as this may be, since a unique propensity to laugh at my own
flaws or failures is another honest forte I developed, some kind of divine
right to laugh at others evolved. I’m not sure if this is some form of
narcissism. I do wish most folks would
see things as I d/o: Worrying hurts you & everyone. Getting pissed helps no
one. Hey I get angry too but all who know me know I always blame myself then quickly
make fun of myself… I do also lash out, irrationally at times. But my anger is
always short lived. Those who really know Jules will attest my will to make up
& be friends again…I really own intense adoration for people who care about
themselves, try hard & care about others all their abilities. Why not learn
to accept what you cannot control at this moment. I find joking & laughing
& not being serious great therapy. That doesn’t change requirements to
succeed at what’s needed or required or desired; not mine anyway. But we can only do so much before we begin to
decay. Why hurt anyone, anything or yourself if it doesn’t help you? I honestly
believe it’s funny when people do that. Like angry animals they lash out in bad
moods… My Mom, except for her looks was
not unique as her Dad & not accomplished as her siblings; (my Aunts Marilyn
& Lynda & Uncle Morty) in life. Harmless as a sheep & devoted to
her children (Helen, older Sis by 3 years, me & Brian, younger by 6 years
than me), Barbie was (& still is) always “lost”; unsure of herself in most
ways. Mom thought she needs to depend on others albeit she had the physical
health to fend for herself. Nobody understood why such a decent-looking
specimen was so insecure emotionally.
My Dad
Alvin,
my Dad was also in some world. Al Lupowitz died on December 25th, More confident than Barbie, he was, “OK”, as a young man
seemingly independent, mentally as strong as he was physically strong &
handsome. Nothing ended up being further from the truth. In Korean War Dad said
he, “killed a few chinks” but his job or position of repairing stoves for the
solders was questionable to me. Grandpa Charley Lupowitz was Al’s father &
in the trucking business, moving restaurant equipment where Al may’ve helped. I
was told Al couldn’t work with Charley
so he tried a few jobs & businesses, even driving a cab, apparently failing
‘em all… Connecting with a partner called Rocky, he opened his company, A to Z
Restaurant Equipment and Handling (or something) which survived for some time.
I loved going to work with my big strong Dad who looked like Clark Kent with
his horn-rim glasses & Superman without them, to little Julie. From 8 years old on, I got to ride in Dad’s
big truck, shift some gears, work the tailgate, move, pack & unpack smaller
items, clean equipment they bought & learned to rebuilt equipment to sell
from the big warehouse in Brooklyn where they let me operate a freight
elevator. I recall seeing what seemed like
skilled, fast-talking auctioneers & wanting to work hard; I loved it &
loved the money that financed mini bikes & clothes.
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